Feb Refresh

Mama Jay’s Letter

Jewel Hancock

Feb 25, 2026

Is today going to be the day? That I write LLL? Is today going to be the day?

3 months ago I wrote about a rebirth.

Pretty sure that’s happening for all of us.

Nothing special here.

I am wishing this letter finds you warm and well. If you’re not well that’s okay too. There is a bit of fallout lately from the collapse of this paradigm. As we can see. It’s cracking me open a little and for me that means sometimes I don’t feel well physically, emotionally, spiritually or mentally or all at one time. I see you and validate you. I am happy we are on this journey together.

Making art helps.

Lists

Always with the lists

Today I’m sitting in my house. On the window sill I see a bit of clutter. Upon closer inspection, we can see 4 things:

EXPO dry erase markers (4 colors-jewel tones)
- These are markers for teaching my child reading. I have worked with Nikolai Pizarro of Raising Readers since my child was an infant. She is an educator who has helped me jog my memory of teaching reading. She teaches parents how to teach their children reading so that education may be more equitable. My child and I are working on a few sounds to make a word. I am thoroughly enjoying myself.
- This is an area that I’ve changed opinion on since becoming a parent as well. At one time I was interested in having a child that could read at 3 and 4 years old. Though along the way I realized that they grow up very fast and reading exposes another world to a child. I am not protecting mine from it. Though I am not as obsessed with early reading anymore. So we are taking it slow.
A short chapter book for “developing readers” called “The Secret of the Silver Shoes.”
- Another one of my child’s items. This is a book I picked up in the neighbourhood for free. I was looking forward to reading it with my child but he looked inside of the book and saw a “scary face.” That was probably one of the expressions of a character in the illustrations. So then he didn’t want to read it and I told him I would give the book to another child. This example really shows where he’s at in his development. He likes to “read” and screen books alone and he knows what he likes and doesn’t like.
Wrongly addressed mail a tax document and a vanguard statement. Neither for the same person.
- We live in an apartment building in which so many people have lived before. We get stacks of mail (important mail).
The hardcover copy of “the life changing magic of tidying up” by Marie Kondo.
- This book is really good go read it now. Another free book picked up. I was hoping to pass it to my husband as he’s been passionate about home projects since Jan. 1. Though I’d love to read it again when I have some time. I am currently reading 10+ books of course which all get picked up and put down haphazardly. Some of the books I am reading now are “The Autobiography of My Mother” by Jamaica Kincaid, “Know It All” by John Waters, and “A Court of Thorns and Roses” by Sarah J. Maas.
- Reading is an antidote to my disease called “Gemini sun sign”.

These winter days in NYC are changing me now. It’s a little cabin fever pressure cooker with this weather with kids. I reinvent myself on the daily or maybe hourly. Turning over new rocks to find more energy like a magic mother.

Daily practices become important. Though it seems impossible, pouring into oneself is important. And sometimes I’ve found it is all there is.

Writing in a linear way has been difficult for me lately. All I do these days is process, process, type out thoughts. Hoard words.

Blackout Poem:

Text within this block will maintain its original spacing when published

There hasn’t been a      single     LLL letter written here that was not     spiritual.       Doesn’t it get exhausting though to put a take on       everything for ourselves.     There are days    when it’s like When I sit down to write     these days.   I feel I am coming from.  too many places  mentally to be able    to compose myself. I sit here now    composing myself   and I feel like the message is empty. A lot of everything feels like effort these days.                   The juicy bit    of writing sit    within the goofy      and insightful     moments.     i have with my child. As his mom,       there isn’t much time       or space to make a composed piece out of      his hilarious quotes    That can be frustrating as it seems like the.    juicy material is always slipping away     from me. At the same time       the great conversations.   funny quotes and      meanderings of language   are the best thing to just                                           be present for and enjoy    My mental lists are always being     squeezed        for info and      for value   Some of the      mental lists are just there.    and never get used. There’s one dark and      unfortunate list        that i have to admit to. It is a list that hurts as it is being made. And that’s      the perfectionist list.    The      Groundhog Day      of it all really means i need to turn my brain on and know when i need to      be more present   Not resentful, angry or irritable